We used to overpack badly. Our first trip with a baby included a travel crib, a bathtub, a sterilizer and roughly four days of "just in case" outfits. We barely left the hotel. Since then we have refined a system that gets a family of four out the door with one checked bag and carry-ons, whether we are headed to Paris for a week or Thailand for a month. Less stuff means less to carry, less to lose and less to fold, and with kids that matters more than any outfit you left behind.

One bag per person

Every member of the family, including the kids, is responsible for their own bag. The kids get small backpacks with their own things in them, a lovey, a few toys, their own snacks. They are absurdly proud of carrying their own luggage, and it teaches them that travel has limits.

For the adults, our rule is one carry-on sized bag each plus a personal item, and at most one checked suitcase for the whole family on longer trips. If a bag cannot fit everything, the answer is not a bigger bag. The answer is laundry.

The capsule wardrobe for kids

Kids do not need an outfit per day. They need clothes that all match each other. Our system:

  • Five to six tops per child, all in colors that go with every bottom
  • Three bottoms, plus one nicer option for dinners
  • Seven pairs of underwear and socks, the one category we do not ration
  • One warm layer and one rain layer, regardless of destination
  • Two pairs of shoes maximum, one worn on travel day
  • One sleep set

Everything is chosen so any top works with any bottom. Five tops and three bottoms make fifteen outfits, and a small stain on one piece ruins nothing. We buy plain, cheap, durable travel clothes, because they get destroyed and we refuse to mourn them.

For adults we do a softer version of the same thing. Neutral colors, layers, shoes that can walk ten kilometers a day. We have written more about the theme-park version of this in what to pack for Disneyland with a baby, where the walking-shoes rule becomes a survival rule.

The essentials list, and what we never bring

This list lives in a note on our phones and has not changed in years.

Documents and money:

  • Passports, checked twice, once when booking and once the week before
  • Copies of everything, digital and one paper set
  • Travel insurance details
  • Two payment cards stored separately

Health:

  • Kids' pain and fever reliever, in original packaging
  • Thermometer
  • Band-aids and antiseptic wipes
  • Any prescription medications, plus a copy of the prescriptions
  • Rehydration salts, the single most useful thing in a hot country with a sick kid

Gear:

  • Lightweight stroller that folds small, or a carrier for the little one
  • Travel crib only if the accommodation does not provide one, and we always email ahead to ask
  • Night light, because hotel rooms are either blinding or pitch black
  • A couple of ziplock bags and a small roll of garbage bags, for wet clothes and disasters

For flights, the diaper bag is packed separately and we cover it in detail in flying with a baby. For road trips, the car kit is in our road trips with kids guide.

And here is what never makes the list:

  • More than two pairs of shoes per person. Shoes are the biggest space thieves in a family suitcase.
  • "Just in case" formal clothes. We have never once needed them.
  • Heavy toys. The kids play with hotel pens, remote controls and cardboard boxes anyway.
  • A full pharmacy. We bring the medicines our family needs, check destination rules for prescriptions and buy ordinary extras locally when appropriate.
  • Large amounts of food from home. We carry familiar snacks for travel days and dietary needs, then shop locally. Chiang Mai taught us how useful simple rice and noodle dishes can be alongside the spicier food.
  • The travel bathtub. We said it once, we will not say it again.

Laundry on the road

Laundry is the engine that makes light packing possible. Our approach depends on the trip:

  • Trips under a week. We pack enough to go the whole trip without laundry, using the capsule system above.
  • Trips of one to three weeks. We do laundry once a week, either at a laundromat, through the accommodation, or by hand in the sink. We pack a small tube of concentrated detergent and a sink stopper, and we dry clothes overnight on the shower rod or a travel line.
  • Long trips and hot climates. Laundromats or local laundry services every few days. In Southeast Asia, laundry services are cheap, fast and often better than what we can do by hand in a humid bathroom.

The one rule is never to let dirty clothes hit critical mass. A small load every few days is easy. One giant load at the end of week two is a lost afternoon.

Packing for different climates

The capsule system flexes, but a few things change by climate.

Cold and Nordic. Layers beat bulk. Base layer, fleece, shell, for everyone. One proper warm coat per person, worn on travel day, never packed. Hats and gloves go in coat pockets so they cannot get lost in the bag.

Hot and humid. Loose, light, quick-dry fabrics and more tops than usual, because kids may change more often in humidity. We pack hats, rash guards for swimming and enough sunscreen for the first days, then restock if needed. In Singapore and on visits to Koh Samui, rash guards and sandals earned their space.

Mixed and unpredictable. This is most of our travel, honestly. The rain shell and the warm layer go in every bag regardless of forecast, and we check the weather three days before departure and adjust quantities, not categories.

The night before

The system only works if we actually use it, so the last step is a ritual. The night before any trip, everything is packed, bags are by the door, documents are in one adult's jacket pocket, and the kids choose their travel-day clothes. Mornings with children are chaos by nature, and we refuse to add packing to that mix.

The full picture of how we travel is in our family travel guide, which covers planning, getting around, and where we stay once all this stuff arrives with us.